There once was a boy with an insatiable thirst. Polydipsia, as it's known, had encumbered him for as long as he could remember. When he was an infant, a suckling session would physically deflate his mother, leaving her exhausted and delirious for hours afterwards. And his kindergarten peers would taunt him mercilessly while he spent minor eternities at the drinking fountain. “Leave some for the fish!” they would yell, pelting him with spitballs as they impatiently awaited their turn.